What are some ways I can deal with being the family scapegoat?

It would be very difficult to change the behaviour patterns of a whole family. I think your idea of moving is possibly the best option. You do not have to stay around for all that abuse. Mind you I think it would be a much better idea if you could defuse the situation by having nothing to do with them. If your mother could just say NO to the command to visit and while I don't want to join the band of people accusing her, she should have done so long ago. I am not hopeful that she will be able to do it now. So go away and make a peaceful life for yourself.